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Chocolate Chip Cookies - kimberlykv

Make sure to cool your cookies before their ascension into the realm of godhood!

The Cookie Recipe used throughout time that has brought men to their knees, changed the molecular structure of the universe, brought about the apocalypse, bent the fabric of time, created gods, ended empires, and made grandmas everywhere proud, is now yours to enjoy!

The Perfect Cookie RecipeEdit

Makes approximately 24 to 36 cookies, depending on how generous you feel.

IngredientsEdit

  • 3/4 cup white sugar
  • 1 cup brown sugar
  • 1 cup butter, softened
  • 2 teaspoon vanilla extract
  • 2 large eggs, slightly beaten
  • 3 cups all-purpose flour
  • 3/4 teaspoon baking soda
  • 3/4 teaspoon salt
  • 3 cups semi-sweet chocolate chips
  • And a pinch of grandma's love.

InstructionsEdit

  1. Achieve immortality.
  2. Preheat oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit, which is about 175 degrees Celsius.
  3. Cream sugars and butter.
  4. Add vanilla and eggs and mix well.
  5. Combine dry ingredients together and gradually add to creamed mixture.
  6. Stir in chocolate chips.
  7. Roll into 1 1/4" balls and place on non-stick cookie sheets, about 2" apart.
  8. Bake for 10 to 12 minutes.
  9. Play cookie clicker while waiting.
  10. Allow to cool. Or burn your mouth with deliciousness.
  11. Thank your grandma(s).
  12. Enjoy. (optional)
  13. Keep enjoying until you are very, very fat. (Still optional)
  14. Avoid the grandmapocalypse (also optional)

Recipe for every cookie upgrade (work in progress)Edit

Note: Every cookie without a formal recipe should be considered "in need of a recipe." This INCLUDES the "ripoff" cookies (e.g. Girl Scout cookies, Grease's, etc.)

Icon Name Ingredients Directions Note
Plain cookies
  • 1 c. butter
  • 1 c. brown sugar
  • 1 c. sugar
  • 2 eggs
  • 1 tsp. vanilla
  • 3 c. flour
  • 1 tsp. baking soda
  • 1/4 tsp. salt
  1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (177 degrees C)
  2. Cream butter, add sugars and mix well.
  3. Add eggs and vanilla
  4. Add flour, slowly mix in salt and baking soda.
  5. Put in oven for 8 to 10 minutes.
Sugar cookies
  • 1 1/2 cups softened butter
  • 1 cups white sugar
  • 4 eggs
  • 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
  • 5 cups all-purpose flour
  • 2 teaspoons baking powder
  • 1 teaspoon salt


  1. In a large bowl, cream together butter and sugar until smooth. Beat in eggs and vanilla.
  2. Stir in the flour, baking powder, and salt.
  3. Cover, and chill dough for at least one hour (or overnight).
  4. Preheat oven to 400 degrees F (200 degrees C).
  5. Roll out dough on floured surface 1/4 to 1/2 inch thick. Cut into shapes with any cookie cutter. Place cookies 1 inch apart on ungreased cookie sheets.
  6. Bake 6 to 8 minutes in preheated oven. Cool completely.

Ready in 3 hours. Makes 60 cookies. Contains 109 calories per cookie. "Whenever you make these cookies for someone, be sure to bring along several copies of the recipe! You will be asked for it, I promise!"

Oatmeal raisin cookies
  • 3/4 cup softened butter
  • 3/4 cup white sugar
  • 3/4 cup packed light brown sugar
  • 2 eggs
  • 1 tsp vanilla extract
  • 1 1/4 cups all-purpose flour
  • 1 tsp baking soda
  • 3/4 tsp ground cinnamon
  • 1/2 tsp salt
  • 2 3/4 cups rolled oats
  • 1 cup raisins
  1. Preheat oven to 375 degrees F (190 degrees C).
  2. In the large bowl, cream together butter, white sugar, and brown sugar until smooth.
  3. Beat in the eggs and vanilla until fluffy. Stir together flour, baking soda, cinnamon, and salt.
  4. Gradually beat into butter mixture. Stir in oats and raisins.
  5. Put onto ungreased cookie sheets. Bake 8 to 10 minutes in the preheated oven, or until golden brown.
  6. Cool slightly, remove from sheet to wire rack. Cool completely.
Ready in 1 hour. Makes 48 cookies. Contains 92 calories per cookie. "An old stand-by that the whole family loves."
Peanut butter cookies
  • 1 cup unsalted butter
  • 1 cup crunchy peanut butter
  • 1 cup white sugar
  • 1 cup packed brown sugar
  • 2 eggs
  • 2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
  • 1 tsp baking powder
  • 1/2 tbsp salt
  • 1 1/2 tbsp baking soda
  1. Cream butter, peanut butter, and sugars together in a bowl; beat in eggs.
  2. In a separate bowl, sift flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt; stir into butter mixture. Put dough in the refrigerator for 1 hour.
  3. Preheat oven to 375 degrees F (191 degrees C)
  4. Roll dough into 1 inch balls and put on baking sheets.
  5. Flatten each ball with a fork, making a crisscross pattern. Bake in a preheated 375 degrees F oven for about 10 minutes or until cookies begins to brown.
Ready in 1 hour and 25 minutes. Makes 24 cookies. Contains 252 calories per cookie. "Makes great cookies!"
Coconut cookies
  • 1 1/4 cups all-purpose flour
  • 1/2 tsp baking soda
  • 1/4 tsp salt
  • 1/2 cup butter
  • 1/2 cup packed brown sugar
  • 1/2 cup white sugar
  • 1 egg
  • 1/2 tsp vanilla extract
  • 1 1/3 cups flaked coconut
  1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C)
  2. Combine the flour, baking soda, and salt; set aside.
  3. In a separate bowl, cream the butter, brown sugar, and white sugar until smooth.
  4. Beat in the egg and vanilla until light and fluffy.
  5. Gradually blend in the flour mixture, then mix in the coconut.
  6. Drop dough by teaspoonfuls onto an ungreased cookie sheet. Cookies should be about 3 inches apart.
  7. Bake for 8 to 10 minutes in the preheated oven, or until lightly toasted. Cool on wire racks.
Ready in 50 minutes. Makes 36 cookies. Contains 75 calories per cookie. "Lots of coconut and sugar make these cookies chewy and delicious."
​​​​​ Almond cookies
  • 1/2 cup butter, softened
  • 1/2 cup white sugar
  • 1 egg
  • 1 1/4 cups all-purpose flour
  • 1/2 cup ground almonds
  • 2 tsp amaretto liqueur
  1. Preheat oven to 400 degrees F (204 degrees C).
  2. In large bowl, cream together the butter and sugar. Beat in the egg, amaretto, and almonds.
  3. Gradually mix in the flour until well blended.
  4. Drop by teaspoonfuls 2 inches apart on ungreased cookie sheets.
  5. Bake for 5 to 8 minutes, or until cookies begin to brown.
Ready in 30 minutes. Makes 24 cookies. Contains 95 calories. "An almond lover's cookie!"
Hazelnut cookies
Walnut cookies
White chocolate cookies
Macadamia nut cookies
Double-chip cookies
White chocolate macadamia nut cookies
All-chocolate cookies
Dark chocolate-coated cookies
White chocolate-coated cookies
Eclipse cookies
Zebra cookies
Snickerdoodles
Stroopwafels
Macaroons
Madeleines
Palmiers
Palets
Sablés
Caramoas
Sagalongs
Shortfoils
Win mints
Gingerbread men
Gingerbread trees
Pure black chocolate cookies
Pure white chocolate cookies
Ladyfingers
Tuiles
Chocolate-stuffed biscuits
Checker cookies
Butter cookies
Cream cookies
Gingersnaps
Cinnamon cookies
Vanity cookies
Cigars
Pinwheel cookies
Fudge squares
Shortbread biscuits
Millionaires' shortbreads
Caramel cookies
Pecan sandies
Moravian spice cookies
Anzac biscuits
Buttercakes
Ice cream sandwiches
Pink biscuits
Whole grain cookies
Candy cookies
Big chip cookies
One chip cookies
Sprinkles cookies
Peanut butter blossoms
No-bake cookies
Florentines
Chocolate crinkles
Maple cookies
Persian rice cookies
Norwegian cookies
Crispy rice cookies
Ube cookies
Butterscotch cookies
Speculaas
Chocolate oatmeal cookies
Molasses cookies
Biscotti
Waffle cookies
Empire biscuits
British tea biscuits
Chocolate British tea biscuits
Round British tea biscuits
Round chocolate British tea biscuits
Round British tea biscuits with heart motif
Round chocolate British tea biscuits with heart motif
Fig gluttons
Loreols
Jaffa cakes
Grease's cups
Digits
Butter horseshoes
Butter pucks
Butter knots
Butter slabs
Butter swirls
Lombardia cookies
Bastenaken cookies
Festivity loops
Rose macarons
Lemon Macarons
Chocolate Macarons
Pistachio Macarons
Hazelnut Macarons
Violet Macarons
Caramel Macarons
Licorice Macarons
Skull cookies
Ghost cookies
Bat cookies
Slime cookies
Pumpkin cookies
Eyeball cookies
Spider cookies
Christmas tree biscuits
Snowflake biscuits
Snowman biscuits
Holly biscuits
Candy cane biscuits
Bell biscuits
Present biscuits
Elderwort biscuits
Bakeberry cookies
Duketater cookies
Green yeast digestives
Wheat slims
Pure heart biscuits
Ardent heart biscuits
Sour heart biscuits
Weeping heart biscuits
Golden heart biscuits
Eternal heart biscuits
Dragon cookie
Milk chocolate butter biscuit
Dark chocolate butter biscuit
White chocolate butter biscuit
Ruby chocolate butter biscuit
Lavender chocolate butter biscuit
Synthetic chocolate green honey butter biscuit
Royal raspberry chocolate butter biscuit
Ultra-concentrated high-energy chocolate butter biscuit
Pure pitch-black chocolate butter biscuit
Birthday cookie

Plain cookie

White frosting

Candle(optional)

Add frosting onto the plain cookie and put the candle on and light it.